anxious? concerned? confused?

i read this article last week (in the new york times) and thought that you might like it.  it’s all about our ability to weigh the risks vs benefits of a situation and judge accordingly.

what i find interesting is that it talks about how affected we are, as individuals, by an abundance or lack of information on a topic.  in other words – it states that being bombarded by information in the media makes us more anxious about those things, rather than things that might actually cause us more harm, but isn’t widely acknowledged/known.

it reminded me of the following Writing from Baha’u'llah:

What “oppression” is more grievous than that a soul seeking the truth, and wishing to attain unto the knowledge of God, should know not where to go for it and from whom to seek it? For opinions have sorely differed, and the ways unto the attainment of God have multiplied. This “oppression” is the essential feature of every Revelation. Unless it cometh to pass, the Sun of Truth will not be made manifest. For the break of the morn of divine guidance must needs follow the darkness of the night of error. For this reason, in all chronicles and traditions reference hath been made unto these things, namely that iniquity shall cover the surface of the earth and darkness shall envelop mankind.

(Baha’u'llah, The Kitab-i-Iqan, p. 31)

in a sense, this imposition of confusion on our society (and it’s not just by the media, and it’s not just the media’s fault) is a form of oppression.  ‘Abdu’l-Baha tells us that “When thou lookest about thee with a perceptive eye, thou wilt note that on this dusty earth all humankind are suffering.” (Abdu’l-Baha, Selections from the Writings of Abdu’l-Baha, p. 184)  there’s various forms of suffering, of course, and i don’t mean to diminish what anyone is going through.  the reality is simply this: that in one form or another, every individual on this planet is hindered from finding truth.

you might read that and say “well, not everyone wants to look for truth”.  and i would respond: they’re all looking for something real, in some form.  and from there we would get into a discussion of conscious and unconscious search… which is a whole series of posts… and discussions, really.  because, at the end of the day, i don’t really know what i’m saying – i’m just sharing some thoughts and hoping that it creates a dialogue – somewhere, somehow.

wishing for more

as a university student, i was always proud of my education.  i mean, i’d complain as much as any student, though perhaps with a more vehement vocabulary, and a dash of feminist thought, but really, i was proud.  my high school education was one of the best in my city, and when i travelled and talked to friends in other parts, i realized it was possibly one of the best in general.  my university degree, though it was a science degree, required that i take courses in the humanities, arts, and languages, and i did with pleasure.  in addition to this, i kept up with the news as much as i could, and in terms of english literature, i consider myself better read than most of my peers. in my interactions with more prominent young baha’is, i knew full well that i lacked knowledge, understanding, and insight relative to them, but this i tried to remedy with ample amounts of service, through taking as many training courses as were available, and trying to engage others in meaningful conversations about the world and the baha’i faith.  so overall, i considered myself pretty well-off in the knowledge/understanding area, when it came to the world.

but, there was one area that i never cared to learn too much about… and, had i been more humble in my approach, perhaps i would’ve caught this deficiency sooner.  azar nafisi talks in her latest book, things i’ve been silent about, about how she wasn’t as concerned with her mom’s stories as she was concerned with the gaps in her mom’s stories. i am now learning that i should also be concerned with the gaps.

i am curious to know where the middle east played into my education.  in high school, i learned about colonialist expansion, and about how europe got together and drew a map over africa and split it up – like i might cut a pizza when i’m having friends over for dinner… but it wasn’t until december this year, in speaking to my mother, that i learned that europe did the same with the middle east!  where were the wars that were fought there since 1945?  for four years, i learned all about the cold war, the cuban missile crisis, vietnam, etc – of course, these all implicated the states and canada, but so did the hostage taking in 1980 in iran, did it not?  what about jimmy carter and camp david?  where was that stroke of american brilliance in my history lessons?

in university, i took anthropology classes, literature and culture, political science courses, religious studies… there i learned all about south american cultures, little pacific islands, africa (you’d think anthropologists only went to africa in the 20th century – asia doesn’t even exist in my textbooks); my literature course too – all of the post-colonial literature was centered on africa; my polisci course focused on democracy and change in the world…. but i learned only about locke, smith, marx, the states and africa (i even learned about mao and the cultural revolution!); religious studies, ok, we talked a bit about islam and about how muslims aren’t all terrorists.  thanks for the memo.  i didn’t realize that not all white people enjoyed raping whole continents either.  as if.

so where is the middle east?!

the irony is that growing up in central north america as a persian, you grow up with no other non-white friends.  i lived among blond, blue-eyed, church-going people… and that’s very much what i was – until my teacher decides to ask for the “persian opinion” and would pick on me.  but i hated everything to do with the middle east and iran, because of my environment.  so i never cared to learn about it.  so, when no one spoke about it at school,or in university (except to mention 9/11 and how terrible the war on terror is) – i never noticed, and in fact, i can look back now, and say… i was probably relieved.  again, this was another reason why i realized there were gaps in my education.

as i mentioned in my last post, i’ve taken to reading the new york times.  i don’t live anywhere near new york, but what i find is that they give more meat to the story than say, the online versions of the cbc, or the bbc (cnn i can’t even go near – it’s against everything i hold true).  this was about the same time as i started to learn more about the middle east, and suddenly… i began to understand why the middle east – especially, iran – and the states have so much against each other.  so when ahmadinejad asks for an apology from the US government for 60 years of meddling, i understand now why this is so important to iran-US relations (and also why it would never happen).

i say all this, because i just read an article about iran’s offer to washington to have a dialogue with respect and fairness.  i know, reading this, that i have no true understanding as to the forces at play, and the influence of history and politics on the back and forth that is currently taking place between iran and the US.  but i do know that for many westerners, it will be difficult to comprehend why this little dance even exists.  the sad part is that if we continue not learning about our past, or teaching our children about how much countries in our world affected each other, and are affecting each other – it will only lead to further misunderstanding.  in 20 years, when our leaders are made up of my generation, will anyone even remember why americans care if iranians arm themselves?  or will we just ready ourselves, aim our weapons, and fire at will?  or do we expect that we’ll just spontaneously gain insight into the nuances of foreign policy and then suddenly everyone will be happy and there’ll be peace on earth?

i, for one, wish that i’d learned more in the past.  i hope you’ll join me in trying to learn more about charting our future.

away teaching project

so this past weekend i made a spur of the moment trip to another cluster for their expansion phase.  their cluster is larger geographically than mine, but has less baha’is, and also not many youth – or at least, active youth.  in any case, i figured that it would be wise for me to go and get some more experience with direct teaching – and my auxiliary board member actually came out and said to me “i think you should come” so i drove out with her and another baha’i from my cluster.

this cluster is just starting to get their feet wet – so the project was only two days long.  but what we learned is that, at this stage, the quality of the learning was key.  the morning finds us at home base – us three from my cluster were all in our 20’s, whereas the local baha’is participating in the project were all 50+ years old.

it was wonderful.

age is an attitude, my friends.  these souls were there to learn, and were just selfless in their approach toward this process.  and it’s funny because they think that because they’re older, they can’t contribute – or at least, there is this sense of youth = capable.  i don’t know where this idea comes from… maybe people are feelin that way because of some of the trends in our activities lately, but it’s so important to dispel this myth.  being involved in serving the Plan does not require anything but a humble posture of learning.  this has been my biggest lesson these past few months, as my own cluster has started to rise to a new level of activity in two neighborhoods.

i also learned that things have to move little by little.  and by things i mean everything.  my own progress, the progress of other individuals, the progress of the community, and that of the institutions.  little by little.  often i find myself telling myself that i’m not good at this or that, and i get frustrated when i try and these gradiose expectations that i had dreamed up don’t come to pass.  but it’s unreasonable to expect such things! it’s wonderful to have high standards, but setting yourself up for failure is not good.  one must be realistic.  i have to be realistic.

i also learned that sometimes, people just aren’t interested – and i shouldn’t be attached to whether they are or not.  you know, the first day, every door we knocked either didn’t answer or didn’t care.  and that brought me down.. but really, it’s not about me at all – and actually, it’s a bounty just to have the ability to go to someone’s door and knock on it and give them the opportunity to learn.  so i should be grateful for every step that i took this past weekend.  i know we all theoretically know about being detached from results, but it’s a whole other story when you’re outside in the cold, your partner is feeling dejected, and people are rude. then the next day we had a really beautiful experience, and my partners got super excited and such.   but you know, if we’re not attached to results – then we should neither rejoice at a positive response, nor be sorrowful with negative responses.  it’s all about the middle path.

anyway, those were some pieces of learning that i thought i’d share.

more to come in the coming days/weeks.